Light Crossing Boder

This post will have separate emotions! So which one should I kick off with, the less serious stuff or the serious stuff? Hmm, personally, I'd go with the less serious stuff ... so let's start with that.

Yes, Jordan, Monster Lab is interestingly fun. I like the Tim Burton-esque overall design, and though the game tried to be corny, I actually didn't take it as lame. Monster Lab is an simulation/RPG/board game hybrid, and I can't say I don't love it. It's not truly addictive, however I find myself drawn to it. Basically, you collect ingredients (which are basically random materials) to create body parts, then assemble them up as you like to create a monster. Depending on the ingredients you use, the resulting product may be defective or enhanced with a special effect. Then you bring your monster to other places/dungeons where you move your monster in a board game-like fashion. By coming into contact with renegade monsters you can engage combat, and by finding things called Resource Locators you can commence a Challenge - a mini-game or sorts that can net you valuable ingredients should you succeed. Battles are simplistic, and sometimes too easy it may feel repetitive. Like in the PSX ARPG Vagrant Story, different attacks attack different body parts of the enemy. The main thing you must disable is the enemy's torso, but feel free to decapitate other parts to decrease the opponent's firepower. I currently have 2 monsters in hand, Sloth and Envy. I once had a Wrath, but I 
discarded it since it has too low an energy capacity. Yes, I name my monsters after the 7 Great Sins, and I'll make sure Pride is godlike. Sloth and Envy has different statistics - the former focuses on defense and capacity, while the latter has higher speed and health. They are equal in strength though. Graphics are just fine, while in terms of sound, I guess the developer, Eidos Interactive, did their best. However, I do not like Dr Fuseless' voice acting. Ugh. In terms of replayability, I guess you may want to replay with different monsters in your arsenal, but there's pretty much no bonuses. I'll give the game 3/5.

Edbert, Chilli and I were playing on MSN Messenger! We were continuously disconnecting then reconnecting with usernames like Your Father, Your Mother et cetera. I sparked the whole thing when I saw how Edbert put his username as 'has just signed in' ... then I tried to have fun with the names. Sadly Edbert had to stop since he got scolded for doing so ... poor thing. The chain effect was funny, but I did expect more people to join in, despite the whole thing being fairly lame. Talking about Chilli, I have a personal message for him and hopefully he reads this: You were attacked by Dr Salvador (the chainsaw guy) while in the Village right? I found a way to miss him entirely. From my research, it turns out that Dr Salvador will appear if you take the Shotgun from the two-storey house. However, this afternoon I took the Shotgun after the villagers retreated (after 
the church bell rang) and Dr Salvador didn't appear. Also, hopefully you have rescued the dog at the start of the game (before the Village) as it will help you out in a later boss fight (VS El Gigante). Damn, I am addicted to Resident Evil 4. Wait, since when is RE not addictive? Since new RPGs are scarce, I'm alternating to other genres for the time being, and you seriously have to love survival horror games.

Let's go on to the serious part now as there's only roughly 20 minutes till 11. I don't want others to think that I'm obsessedly trying to take up my idol as an adoptive father. So, I tried giving my father chances. Last night, I was about to take my bath when my mother insisted that she takes faster baths. So since I've shutted down my computer and I wouldn't want to be gaming for only 20 - 25 minutes, I grabbed my deck of Uno H2O (it's a limited waterproof edition with two special cards ... Wild Downpour & Wild Downpour +2 ... now you see that I go for anything water-themed?) and tried getting my maid to play with me, since it didn't seem like she's doing anything besides staring at the TV. I was in the middle of consecutively asking her when my father shouted, "Shut up, motherf***er!" in Hakka. Before that I actually asked him first to play with me but he preferred chatting with another woman instead of playing with me. Just now I was bored while waiting for my 7 p.m. soap opera to commence after a street badminton match (my shirt was drenched in perspiration), then I spotted my sister with my father on the wooden couch in the living room. So I thought that since my sister is there, maybe my father would stay to play? Instead, when I arrived, he immediately left to his computer for online gambling. I tried teaching my sis who's ailed with down syndrome how to play (it's pretty simple, Uno), but I failed. Last night since there wasn't anyone to play with and my sis was asleep, I resorted to playing against myself. Yeah, I know, it was a pathetic sight and my father still scoffed at me for doing so. Last night before I went to sleep, I just realized one thing after thinking thoroughly. Throughout my life, my father has provided me with the basic needs and minor wants, however, he has never played with me before. Yes, it struck me so deeply. I was like, "My father ... never played with me before? Not once?" the whole night. The thought was still lulling in my mind this morning. Then this afternoon I was standing in front of the fridge, tranced in thought. My father came along and strongly shoved me aside. I do not know whether I should keep letting him take advantage of me giving him chances. I once felt heartless to think badly about my own biological father. But now I think I'm going back on that opinion. I seriously ever felt stupid to think of Mr Willie as a father. But, uh, now, I dunno. I'm aghast. I play games, since you can play them alone. At times I may call my badminton mate over. I never feel bored during the holidays, but at the same time, I feel lonely. I don't have a brother or sister to talk to or play with. I know I ain't the only one 
with a sibling who's afflicted by down syndrome. However others have their parents to fill in the empty slot siblings should occupy. I am never bored in the holidays. Never. I talk to in-game characters without response. I have inner monologues all the time. I can always talk with the other Wilson. But somehow, it's lonely. It's so cold and chilly, my world. My father only has time for his work, his friends and women. He just finances my education so I can support him when he's old. He just uses my mother as a tool. He sometimes come back from travelling with gifts. But that's just it. All he ever shows us is money. I don't think I've ever felt anything else. I know I wouldn't be blogging here if he never existed, however I can't bring myself to feel the least bit of love for him as children should. I don't know. I don't like the mere sight of him, ever. He has never smiled before (serious). Even when others take his picture, he can only show a mean frown. I love my THINGS more than him. I love my games. I love my books. I love my computer. It's his money, of course. Other people feel indebted to their parents. I try to, but it's tough. I do feel indebted to my mother, nevertheless. There's never a family time with my father. If he brings us travelling, he goes off doing his own stuff, e. g. gambling in Genting. I want to play games with my father. I want to watch TV with my father. You can't imagine how many things I want to do with my father. I do so dream to have my own happy family. However, things would never be the same. At that time, the father is ME. Conclusion: I am fated to never really feel the presence of a father or his love. So what if I can provide my future family with love? In the end, there's still this emptiness in me. I can't just patch it up and forget it. I could possibly be jealous of my own children later. In my house, the system has always been like this: my father's the owner of the house, and everyone else are just tenants. We do our own things.  He got me my PS2. He got me my computer. He got me my crappy laptop. He got me my iPhone. He got me my bookshelves. I feel happy with the things, but I needed to strain myself to feel grateful. I know I sound like the bad guy here. But I guess that's just how it always is between my father and me. Just material attempts of bonding. Maybe I will miss him when he dies. A lot. But I don't think I will cry. He's him. 
I'm me. Always. I'll just miss the presence of him. I never mentioned my potential emotion. 
My childhood. Is desolate.

I'm not really sleepy but I don't want to feel tired when I wake up tomorrow. Goodbye. And yes, it's past 11. I'm not so quick a typist I can type all that under 20 minutes. Currently, my father is into yet another blast of verbal abuse.